The Conversations We Avoid Are the Ones We Need Most

The Hard Conversations We Keep Avoiding

I’ve been overly busy the last few weeks. Between working on a software project and remodeling our kitchen, time has been slipping away from me. If you’ve ever done any kind of home renovation, you already know—it’s chaos. My wife and I have been tackling it together. She’s always down to put in the work, and I handle most of it since I’m a jack-of-all-trades. But I still know when to call in a professional.

Some projects are worth figuring out yourself, but others? You’re better off getting help before frustration takes over.

And honestly, that’s a lesson that applies to life too.

This week, I’m a little late on my newsletter because, well—I didn’t get the chance to write as much. But instead of forcing something new, I decided to revisit one of my favorite threads from last week—one that resonated with a lot of people.

The Conversations We Run From

One of my favorite tweets was this thread:

I wrote it because I’ve seen this pattern over and over again. People avoiding hard conversations, cutting people off, and calling it “protecting their peace.”

And look, I get it. Sometimes, stepping away is necessary—especially in abusive environments or truly toxic situations. But in most cases? Avoidance isn’t healing. It’s running.

The hardest conversations are the ones that actually move you forward.

But instead, people ghost. They let relationships dissolve into silence. They stay in friendships filled with unspoken resentment. They sit next to their spouse every night, but the air is thick with things left unsaid.

Why? Because it’s easier to avoid the discomfort than to step into it.

The Power of Speaking Up

We’ve all had moments where we wish someone just knew what they did wrong. But people aren’t mind readers. If you never say anything, you can’t expect change.

And if you’re afraid of confrontation, let me reframe it for you:

✔ Hard conversations don’t have to be fights. They can be bridges.
✔ Confrontation doesn’t have to be aggressive. It can be clarity.
✔ Standing up for yourself doesn’t have to be about “winning.” It’s about releasing what’s weighing you down.

A lot of people let their pride get in the way. They’d rather wait for the sky to fall than say “I’m sorry.” But here’s the truth: you can’t control what they do.

All you can do is release the tension from your own chest. Say what needs to be said. Whether they understand or not? That’s not your responsibility.

But you’ll feel better for speaking your truth.

“Even if they don’t change today, your bravery plants a seed. That seed grows into understanding—maybe not now, maybe not soon—but eventually.”

How I Handle This in My Own Life

My wife and I have an unspoken agreement:
If something is on our minds, we say it. Fully. No passive aggression, no hiding feelings, no sweeping things under the rug.

We don’t always agree, but we always understand where the other person stands. And that’s what makes resolution possible.

It’s not just about romantic relationships either. Friendships, work dynamics, family conflicts—it all improves when you stop avoiding and start addressing.

Yes, boundaries are important. But you set them after you’ve had the conversation, not before. Otherwise, you’re just shutting people out without giving them a chance to show up differently.

The Real Win

When you speak up, you plant a seed. Maybe they won’t change today. Maybe not even soon. But that moment of honesty will stick with them.

And at the very least—you’ll walk away lighter, knowing you showed up for yourself.

So here’s my challenge to you this week:

What’s one conversation you’ve been avoiding?
And what would change if you faced it head-on?

Let me know.

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See you in the next one. Peace.